Good afternoon, Dear Readers!
Every morning, I receive an email with a Scripture in it from a Christian website. It’s a nice way to start my day. Today’s Scripture was 1 Peter 5:8-9:
“8 Be clearheaded. Keep alert. Your accuser, the devil, is on the prowl like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith. Do so in the knowledge that your fellow believers are enduring the same suffering throughout the world.” (CEB)
The last sentence is exactly why i write about some of the topics I write about- to let people know thy aren’t alone.
Growing up with a narcissistic mother, although I knew nothing of narcissism until a few years ago, I knew something was different. My experiences were vastly different than my friends’. I didn’t know anyone else who acted like her or treated their children like my mother treated me. Once I started talking to a school counselor then a couple of therapists when my mother’s abuse peaked when I was 17, I was invalidated. The school counselor said “That doesn’t sound so bad to me” when I told her my mother would scream at me, lecturing me about what a terrible person I was. One therapist, after meeting my mother said she could no longer see me because I was such a “terrible daughter.” My friends couldn’t understand my suffering, obviously, as narcissistic abuse is nearly impossible to understand even when you have experienced it firsthand.
Then in 2012, I developed all of the symptoms of C-PTSD. Suddenly, I became a different person. I was no longer able to hide depression & anxiety as I had previously. I started with flashbacks & more frequent nightmares. My sleep became worse than ever- trouble falling asleep & staying asleep. In discussing some of my symptoms, i learned a lot of people simply don’t care about them. People close to me, not strangers. One person even said I used C-PTSD as a “poor me” card. I told my father that I have this awful disorder twice, & twice he changed the subject.
All of these things have meant I have felt completely alone my entire life. it’s a terrible feeling.
Once I started writing about my experiences though, I learned that I’m not alone. There are many, many other victims of a narcissistic mother out there! The funny part is we all grew up thinking it was just us, that no one understood or experienced the same things.
Many of these people also have C-PTSD as a result of the narcissistic abuse, & many of them feel alone as well due to people close to them not caring.
it is truly tragic how many people feel as if they are completely alone! While I know I can’t change the world, I want to use my writing as a way to reach people, to let them know they aren’t alone. I pray this blog, my website & books do just that, because the truth is, you are not alone! So many other people understand your pain & have been through similar experiences!
I also have 2 forums available. Both are safe places where you can talk about anything you like, gain support, be prayed for or pray for others, learn valuable information & make new friends.
Below is a link to the first forum. It requires registration to read or post. If you’re worried about privacy, create a fake user name rather than using your real name. I only recently started this one, so it is a bit slow as it is just starting. Feel free to start talking though- I will respond, & I believe if a few people start talking, others will join & there will be a snowball effect.
This link is a link to my fan group on facebook. I gave up my fan page for two reasons: one person used it as a means to harass me & privacy for my fans. This group is a closed group, which means that only other members can see what you posted in the group. No one else.
I want to stress, both groups are private & safe. I hope to see you there soon!