I was recently reading a very good email from Dr. Karyl McBride, author of “Will I Ever Be Good Enough?” It’s an incredibly good book for adult daughters of narcissistic mothers.
Anyway, her email was discussing the new book she has coming out soon. She included an exercise in the email for helping you to get to know who you really are. She called it “An inner selfie”. Collect pictures from magazines or from the internet that represent some aspect of yourself.
I’ve done something similar this & it really does help you to get to know & inspire yourself. I have several folders of pictures on my tablet full of pictures that speak to me in some way. I have a folder of pictures that are uniquely feminine- flowers, beautiful women that I would like to model myself after, & other images. There are several folders of various pictures that help me to feel good- one has images of Ireland, another a cabin deep in the woods in a blizzard, another has pictures of the beautiful interiors of luxurious trains, still another contains pictures of Claude Monet’s paintings, another a couple of cute vintage & beautifully restored campers. I also have a folder full of pictures of inspirational quotes & another full of informative & validating quotes about mental health.
Growing up with a narcissistic mother, as you know if you too have one, means you grow up not knowing who you are. You’re simply whatever your mother wants you to be, not the person God made you to be. It’s the same way if you were romantically involved with a narcissist. Today, why don’t you make a decision to learn who you are? Start by collecting pictures that you’re attracted to. Each one will reveal a little bit about who you really are inside, & help you to get to know yourself. You may even learn that you like who you are. 🙂