Being raised by narcissistic parents, you learn early in life that your feelings have no value. No one cares if you are angry or sad, so you need to ignore those feelings. Keep that to yourself & don’t go bothering Mom or Dad with them!
Unfortunately this dysfunctional, unhealthy habit often continues into adulthood. I admit it, I’m guilty of the same thing. I will be 44 years old in April, & still automatically stifle my feelings. Not good!
Stifling your feelings is unhealthy both mentally & physically. Mentally, stifling our feelings can make us very angry &/or depressed. Physically, health problems such as heart disease, kidney disease, high blood pressure & ulcers can happen. Feeling them, the good, bad & indifferent, however, leads to less physical problems & more peace & joy. My husband & I were friends with the realtor who helped us to find our home. He was very open about the fact he had bipolar disorder. He explained he lived with it since his teens, but went undiagnosed for a long time. Eventually, he was diagnosed & found the right combination of medications that helped him stay stable. He was also very in touch with his emotions, probably as a result of living with the awful disorder, which I thought was so cool! (Honestly, I was a bit jealous since I’ve always had problems in that area)
God gave us feelings to let us know when something is good or bad. They are the reason we can enjoy a lovely day with our spouses or we know when someone is mistreating us. Feelings are a wonderful thing, so long as we don’t live life guided only by them. If we did, then we would do only the things we want to do. Not good since we wouldn’t do the less fun things in life such as- going to the grocery store, doing laundry, visiting a sick friend or relative in the hospital or other necessary things.
I just wanted to encourage you today to give yourself permission to feel your feelings. In spite of what you probably heard as a child, you *are* allowed to feel things. You are allowed to be angry, sad, or happy. If God gave you these feelings, then you certainly are allowed to feel them in spite of what anyone else tells you! Choose today to listen to Him, & silence the voice of others who want to control you! They only want what is best for them, not what is best for you. God wants what is best for you!