Many narcissistic mothers have issues with food & weight, & they pass those issues on to their daughters.
My mother told me how fat & ugly I was so often, I went through anorexia at age 10, & bulimia in my teens. She continues to insult my weight very harshly even now, at age 44. Many other daughters of narcissistic mothers I have spoken to have similar stories. Even if they didn’t have an eating disorder, they are convinced they are ugly because they are too fat or too thin.
I think this is often because insecurity in every area is behind narcissism. Insecurity is at the root of their behavior- everything is done in an attempt to make them feel better about themselves. Narcissists also like to project their issues & insecurities on others. Projection allows them to be angry about the issues without admitting their flaws.
Also, narcissistic mothers look at their daughters as competition. If the mother is overweight or underweight, but her daughter has a good figure, it is a guarantee that she will do her level best to make her daughter feel badly about her figure. Making her daughter feel badly will make the narcissistic mother feel good.
If this describes your narcissistic mother, please remember these things! The things she has said to you are a lie! She is only saying those things to hurt you so she can feel better about herself. DO NOT LISTEN TO HER!!!
I know it can be hard to do this, but you need to! You don’t deserve to feel badly about yourself or have eating disorders, especially because of someone else cruelly putting their issues on you. You are fearfully & wonderfully made, according to God’s word (Psalms 139:14). You deserve to love your body, not hate it because of someone else’s issues.