Recently, a friend pointed something out to me & she was absolutely right. Since the fight with my parents in May, I’ve changed. I’m much freer & enjoying life more.
I have to wonder why this is. I think it may be because I finally realized my own value. I don’t deserve the things that my parents do to me. Logically I knew this but the extreme insensitivity of their actions really drove that point home for me during that fight.
It’s funny how things can work out. This very painful, bad event turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I’m shocked, because I was extremely hurt & angry for quite a while after it happened, even wondering if I’d ever come to terms with it. But, God helped me to do that. Since I have dealt with my feelings about it though, I have become much happier than I’ve been in a very long time. I’ve even started being myself for the first time. Some time back, God told me to research the personality of a wolf, as I share many of their traits. For the first time, I see those traits in myself. I’ve also been having a lot of fun & being silly. I crocheted a small Pennywise (the evil clown from Stephen King’s “IT”) for hubby & have been putting him in strange places around the house to surprise him. Hubby has since started doing the same thing to me. We’re having fun just playing, & it feels good! I’ve also almost finished a new book in record time. I’ve been able to focus more on my writing & have a new fire in me to help those who have been affected by narcissistic abuse & to raise awareness.
Romans 8:28 states, “And we know [with great confidence] that God [who is deeply concerned about us] causes all things to work together [as a plan] for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to His plan and purpose.” (AMP) This Scripture is absolutely true!! The situation I mentioned above is evidence of that.
Please be encouraged, Dear Reader. Whatever you are going through, something good can come from it. God wastes nothing. He can bring you blessings even out of your worst hurts.
Cynthia Bailey-Rug, Christian Author 
I listened to a sermon preached by Pastor J D Farag in Hawaii this past Sunday. He preached mainly on prophecy, a topic that is not pertinent to this subject, but he also spoke about adversity. He likened it to the experience of an eaglet thrown out of its nest by the parents who are teaching it to fly. I’m sure that the experience of leaving its warm, cozy, safe nest is jolting at first. But the joy of flying free must certainly be worth it. I think that God works that way with us too. He permits adversity in our lives because it forces us to become dependent on Him for strength, and it’s that strength that enables us to leave the nest where we grew up. That nest should have been a safe and peaceful place but instead it was a place of suffering. In listening to other abuse survivors I’ve observed that many of them came to the decision to cut off or severely limit contact with their narcissist after one final, horrendous episode of abuse that allowed them to see that there was no value in remaining because the abuse would never stop. It happened that way to me. And it took that painful episode for me to realize that it was time for me to fly. You may have the traits of a wolf, Cynthia, but you are flying now. Enjoy!
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You said that so beautifully Suzanne! I love it! 🙂 You’re absolutely right too.
And flying free is absolutely wonderful. ❤
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