Are You Judgmental?

Yesterday, I went to the doctor.  The nurse I saw was new to this office.  She seemed very friendly, thorough & pleasant, which was a nice surprise.  Many nurses there who came & went over the years were far from any of those things.  (Not all were bad of course, but there have been a few rather mean ones.).

 

While the experience wasn’t terribly unpleasant, one thing really ticked me off.  She was judgmental.

 

I admit, I do need to lose some weight, about 20-25lbs.  Not a lot, but my word.. the way this nurse & others I’ve came into contact with at that office act, you’d think I need to be hoisted out of my bed with a crane!  She told me how I need to start making healthy choices for a change.  Really??  How does she know I don’t?  Because of the extra pounds?  Just because I carry some extra weight doesn’t mean I live on pizza & burritos.  In fact, I had a small amount of cottage cheese this morning & nothing else until I came home from the office after 2.  This is pretty typical eating behavior for me.

 

Also, my blood pressure was unusually high today, & I got a lecture about that & how I need to see a doctor asap.  A doctor can give me meds to fix me right up, she said.  I told her before she took it that I had a panic attack on the way to the office, so of course it was going to be elevated & my pulse racing.  She told me again to see a doctor & take care of this, he’ll give me pills that can fix the C-PTSD, blah blah.  And, losing some weight would help my blood pressure too.  All I need to do is go window shopping (she said she LOVES window shopping- I hate it), walk around the mall, walk to the stores sometimes instead of driving (I live on a major highway- that’s just dangerous), & put down the chips & dip (she said she loves that- it’s not an issue for me like it sounds like it is for her).

 

What got me was how she just assumed such things.. assumed I snarf down chips & dip constantly, assumed I can get out with no trouble & assumed that a doctor can give me a pill to fix my C-PTSD.  Thankfully I’ve developed a pretty thick skin to judgmental people.  I could feel shame starting to kick in, but quickly realized it was wrong.  I have nothing to be ashamed of.

 

Shame is what judging makes a person feel.  A deep shame that something is extremely wrong with them or that they are stupid, ugly, fat, disgusting, unworthy, unlovable, etc etc.  If you’re judging someone, this is exactly what you are doing to them.  You’re making them feel all of those horrible things.  It’s not right!  Would you want to feel that way?!  No?  Then why do it to someone else?  It’s cruel & there is no good reason for it!  God doesn’t want us to judge each other, yet people do it on a daily basis, even Christians.  In fact, as an adult child of a narcissistic parent, it can be very easy to be judgmental.  We grow up watching our narcissistic parents judge, criticize & ridicule others & imitate that behavior once we grow up.

 

If you realize you judge people, just stop.  It’s not right, it causes people unnecessary pain & there is absolutely no reason to do it!  In fact, I’d like to encourage you, Dear Reader, to ask God to show you if you’re judgmental & if so, to  help you to stop.

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8 Comments

Filed under Christian Topics and Prayers, Mental Health

8 responses to “Are You Judgmental?

  1. Debbie

    My blood pressure is always high when I see a nurse or a doctor. My doctor suggested I bought a blood pressure monitor so I can record my blood pressure at different times of the day at home. If I’m know I’m going to be checked, I take readings at home for a few days beforehand so I can show them my normal readings.
    Oh, how I hate that – you need to, you should, you must etc., without listening to what you have to say. It’s really annoying and unhelpful.

    Liked by 1 person

    • That’s a good idea your doctor had. I wish mine would go for it. I’ve mentioned I have good readings at home & every single nurse or doctor has brushed me off- all they care about is what shows in the office. Maddening! I really wish more doctors & nurses listened better to their patients! Thankfully this is only where i go for birth control, so I see them briefly once every 10 weeks.

      & yes, that is super annoying & unhelpful!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Sounds like it’s time to find another doctor who doesn’t employ a narcissist. If that’s not possible just send them a copy of this article. That woman had no right to speak to you that way. It was unprofessional and rude.

        Like

        • I’ve wanted to for years, but since we’ve had insurance so hit & miss over the years I figured it’s best to stay with this place since it’s a county clinic & will take me with or without insurance. I hate it but I feel it’s necessary. I have insurance at the moment but not sure for how long.

          Thank you by the way… I agree, it was very unprofessional & rude. That is a good description of her & so many of the staff they’ve had over the years. I wonder if it’s because it is a county clinic rather than a private doctor’s office.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. Angela

    Once, when I had an appointment to get my blood pressure checked, I did my best to remain calm and walked to the medical center hoping that would help keep my blood pressure down. As I sat waiting to be seen, I heard my name being called from reception. My mother had called the medical centre to ask them to give me a message to do something for her and then go to see her! She had to wait till I’d walked home, had my lunch and was ready to drive round. I already knew not to tell her everything I was doing but I wasn’t expecting that, and it didn’t do my blood pressure any good at all.

    Like

  3. Wow, put down the chips & dip? I hope she just has a bad way of wording things… :-/

    Like

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