Identifying Selfish People vs Narcissists

These days, it seems like narcissists are pretty much everywhere.  Yet, many people don’t understand there are differences between selfish people & narcissists.  Selfish people are called narcissists, when the simple fact is, they aren’t narcissistic- they’re just selfish.  And, narcissists are called selfish when in fact, they’re something much darker & more evil- narcissists.

 

Since selfishness is one of the main giveaways that someone is a narcissist, how does one discern a narcissist from someone selfish?  It can be done..

 

Here are 10 ways that can help you to discern selfish people from the narcissistic people.

 

  1. Selfish people are annoying, yes, but narcissists go beyond annoying with their selfishness.  Every single tiny thing can be turned back to them.  Selfish people will discuss topics other than themselves from time to time.
  2. Selfish people are capable of empathy.  Narcissists are not.
  3. Selfish people may not consider your feelings all the time, but they are capable of it & will do it sometimes.  Narcissists?  Not happening.
  4. Selfish people are capable of showing respect.  Narcissists are not.
  5. Selfish people aren’t necessarily envious of everyone they view as more attractive, more talented or more successful.  Narcissists are extremely envious.
  6. Selfish people don’t feel the need to brag about their great accomplishments, skills, looks, etc. like overt narcissists do, nor do they make a show of being a martyr or victim like covert narcissists.
  7. Selfish people can respect a person’s boundaries.  Narcissists refuse to respect boundaries.
  8. Selfish people change if you tell them that their behavior has hurt you.  Narcissists not only don’t change, but try to hurt you even more for daring to confront them.
  9. Selfish people are capable of giving genuine apologies.  Not so with narcissists.  They give fake apologies (“I’m sorry you think I did something bad to you”) or turn the situation around & claim they are your victim.
  10. If you confront a selfish person about something, they won’t rage at you or accuse you of being the selfish one (projecting their flaws onto you).  If you confront a narcissist, you can count on rage, projection or the silent treatment.
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11 Comments

Filed under Mental Health, Narcissism

11 responses to “Identifying Selfish People vs Narcissists

  1. very helpful. Thank you

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  2. Cindy Patterson

    Great!!! and much needed!!

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  3. This is super helpful , thank you for sharing this!

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  4. This is so true. I have dealt with quite a few narcissists in my life so far. It’s greatly disheartening and can cause a lot of damage to have to deal very closely with one. Two of them (that I’ve had close contact with) are in my own family. It’s downright frightening especially when the most recent one was going for my child. I got away but am having to deal with the residual damage caused to my tiny family.

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    • Narcissists are incredibly destructive for sure. I’m not surprised you have a couple in your family. Actually, I’m surprised you don’t have more. Families with narcissists often have quite a few narcissists, not just one.

      It’s hard dealing with the damage I’m sure. Wishing you the best & praying for you! ❤

      Like

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