An Update

This has been a really crappy, awful week to put it mildly.

 

Monday, we had a new storm door installed on the back of our house.  It leads to an enclosed porch, which has a door that leads into the kitchen.  In that brief window of time there was no storm door, my father not only stopped by my home but came onto the porch, into my home!  Remember, we’re no contact so this was quite a shock for me.   I had no idea he’d even come by let alone barge into my home.   I thank God if it had to happen, it happened when it did because my husband dealt with him.  It was ugly.  My husband said he said he wanted to see me.  My mother is in the hospital having a lump removed from her carotid artery, so he wanted to tell me (side note- any prayers for her would be appreciated).  Hubby said he’d tell me.  My father kept demanding to talk to “his daughter” & even accused hubby of keeping me from him.  He said he was going to stay on my porch & wait until I came out to speak to him.  My husband finally told my father if he didn’t leave, he was calling the police.  (I love this man!)  Interestingly, about an hour later, he said, “Yanno.. don’t be surprised if the police show up to do a welfare check.  I just have a feeling.”  I thought no way.. that wouldn’t happen.  How wrong I was…

 

The following evening, there was a knock on my door.  It was a county cop.  He said my father called the police to do a welfare check on me.  My father told the police my husband “kicked him off” our property & wouldn’t let me see him.  This was an experience I never expected to happen since both my parents always liked my husband way more than me.  For my father to turn on him & to waste the time of the local police has been such a shock.

 

Prior to this, he’d sent 4 different people after me to tell me to call him, including his barber.  (Yes, I really am serious!  His barber!!)

 

My first reaction on Monday was to want to cuss out my father for messing with my husband.  Not proud of that, but it’s true.  Thankfully after calming down some, I remembered that narcissists love to bait their victims.  That is what has been happening with my father.  He tried forcing me to see him, then to hurt & anger me to the point I’d contact him.  Even if it was to cuss him out, it’d be narcissistic supply.  Narcissists need someone’s love or hate, since  both strong emotions provide them supply.  Ignoring them deprives them of supply & they can’t handle that.

 

So now, I’m not sure what to expect.  Involving the police was a new low, as far as I’m concerned, so it makes me wonder what else he is capable of doing.

 

And, because once you’ve survived carbon monoxide poisoning, your tolerance for stress goes completely down the toilet, I’ve been pretty much a wreck since Monday physically as well as emotionally.  (FYI- the body produces small amounts of carbon monoxide when stressed.  This is helpful to the body unless it’s already compromised as it is after poisoning.  In that case, your body responds to that small amount as if it was poisoned again).

 

Any prayers would be appreciated!  Thank you!

 

I’m hoping sharing this with you, Dear Reader, is somehow beneficial.  Maybe it can help you to realize the importance of never underestimating a covert narcissist as I did with my father.  Maybe you realize the narcissist in your life may do this type of thing & you can prepare ahead of time for it.  I don’t know.  But, I do hope sharing my story helps you in some way!  xoxo

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10 Comments

Filed under Narcissism

10 responses to “An Update

  1. I’m so sorry that this happened, Cynthia. I’ll pray for you. And thanks, once again, for thinking of us even while you’re going through a tough time. You’re a good friend to us. God bless Eric for stepping up. My husband is in the same position and I know that it’s not easy. Spouses are often the unsung heroes in our lives. They love us, they don’t want to see us suffer, but it’s not easy or pleasant for them to stand up to our abusers.

    Like

  2. jarwithaheavylid

    I’m really not surprised at all. He’s frightened of losing his supply (or reacting to needing to give your mother attention – how dare she get sick / deprive him of supply?!) – he’s pulling out all the tricks in the book.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Angela

    Romans 8:28. I’m praying for you and hoping that good things will come from this. Sending you a big hug and my support.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. kpaol

    …keeping you in prayer also…

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Kimberly

    I can identify with your crappy experience, my mother used to pull the wellness check routine when she couldn’t badger me into responding to her insanity. It’s aggravating and hurtful. I got to the point where, even when she was in Alzheimer’s care and all that came out of her was what was always in her…npd tricks and all, I refused to respond. I finally went no contact and I don’t regret it. I made sure that she was well taken care of, but I stopped putting myself in the line of her abusiveness. Long story short, it’s a painful reality knowing that you never really had a mom. And now I’m in the process of getting free from a husband of 30 years who is a covert narcissist that makes mom look like Mary Poppins. So I’m praying for you to hold your stand, and obey scripture because God says we are not even to greet these kinds of people. I would appreciate your prayers as well as I am disabled (spinal injury, fibromyalgia and adrenal fatigue) and still in the situation. God will make a way, both to do the hard obedience to Him and to have peace until He removes the thorn in the flesh. May the Lord give you peace and help and the knowledge that He knows and will use the situation to grow us up in Him, and will avenge us one way or another….May He grant our tormentors genuine repentance and true rebirth through the biblical Jesus Christ.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Kimberly!

      Thank you so much for your prayers, understanding & wisdom. ❤

      I'm so sorry you've been through so much with your mother & husband! You're most certainly in my prayers. No wonder you're going through such health problems! Such intense stress can do awful things to one's health.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Pingback: How Narcissists Recruit Flying Monkeys | CynthiaBaileyRug

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