It seems like there is a strange believe among many people that processing trauma quickly is a sign of strength. People are admired for getting back to work or a normal routine quickly, & it’s assumed they’re “over it” when they do that. Unfortunately a lot of people who others think are “over it” are actually avoiding dealing with their pain.
Healing from trauma of any sort isn’t a quick process. How could it be? Trauma overloads your mind, emotions & even body. It’s impossible to simply shake it off & move on. It’s even worse when you’ve been exposed to repeated traumas, such as in the case of child abuse.
Never let anyone make you feel weak or ashamed because you’re not “over it” yet. Truly processing trauma takes time, & lots of it. It also takes a great deal of energy & courage to face the ugly truth, to get angry about it, & to grieve about it. It may take a lifetime to do. There is no shame in that. It doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’ve been through unimaginable circumstances.
Cynthia Bailey-Rug, Christian Author 
I’m 2 years and 8 months post-NC. And although my life is considerably better I still struggle every day. Progress is being made, but slowly. It takes a long time (probably years) for us to heal from the devastating effects of abuse. It’s like a flower that slowly unfolds as it blooms. You can’t see it with the naked eye but it is happening. We often use fast forwarding to watch a flower bloom in mere seconds, but there is nothing comparable to see the progress abuse survivors make. Sometimes we can’t even see it ourselves even though it’s happening to us. So how can anyone else know that we’ve had enough time to “get over it”?
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VERY well said!!! *applauds*
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Thank you.
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Thank you so much for posting this. I grow tried of people telling me to put it all past me as the wound is still so fresh.
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You’re welcome!
Terrible.. it’s ridiculous people can be so cruel to those who are suffering.
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