Think No Contact Is Wrong? God Disagrees

One of the things I love so much about the Bible is it never gets old.  Even if you’ve read it countless times, you still will see something new.

This Scripture came to my attention a few minutes ago…

Titus 3:10  “After a first and second warning reject a divisive man [who promotes heresy and causes dissension—ban him from your fellowship and have nothing more to do with him],”  (AMP)

I thought about how this relates to no contact.

 

Many people think those of us who have gone no contact did so on a whim.  The truth is that we struggle a great deal with no contact.  It’s a VERY big & difficult decision!  Some people go no contact but then later resume the relationship when the narcissist gets word to them that they need help, are sick or maybe even they simply wear down the victim by constant stalking & harassment.  Many people who have considered or gone no contact also think it’s not Godly.  You can’t be a Christian & sever ties with an abusive family member or divorce an abusive spouse.  This thinking is completely wrong though, & Titus 3:10 proves that!

 

If you’re in this situation, then I urge you to consider your situation.  Have you prayed about it?  Chances are, if you share my faith then you have.  A LOT!  Yet, you still are leaning towards no contact or you have followed through with it… doesn’t that tell you that it’s ok?  I mean, if it wasn’t, God would find some way to let you know it’s a bad idea.  At the very least, you’d have a feeling inside that it’s not a good solution.  God’s voice may not always boom loudly in our ears, but He does have the Holy Spirit quietly let us know if there is something we should or shouldn’t do.

 

Also, have you done as this Scripture said?  Have you spoken with the narcissist in your life, explaining that their abusive behavior has hurt you?  Again, chances are you have.  Every single person I’ve spoken with who has survived narcissistic abuse whether it was at the hands of a parent, spouse or relative tried talking things out with that narcissist many times.  They didn’t simply end the relationship, & I’m sure you are the same way.

 

Everyone has their limits, & there is nothing wrong with reaching the limits & eliminating toxic, abusive people from your life.  The above Scripture from Titus is only one of many that say this in the Bible.  Here are other Scriptures that show God wants us to be in good, healthy relationships.:

 

  • Psalm 1:1 “Blessed [fortunate, prosperous, and favored by God] is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked [following their advice and example],Nor stand in the path of sinners,Nor sit [down to rest] in the seat of [b]scoffers (ridiculers).”  (AMP)

  • Proverbs 13:20  “He who walks [as a companion] with wise men will be wise,But the companions of [conceited, dull-witted] fools [are fools themselves and] will experience harm.” (AMP)

  • Luke 9:5 “And as for all those who do not welcome you, when you leave that city, shake the dust off your feet [breaking all ties with them] as a testimony against them [that they rejected My message].” ” (AMP)

  • Luke 17:3  “ Pay attention and always be on guard[looking out for one another]! If your brother sins and disregards God’s precepts, solemnly warn him; and if he repents and changes, forgive him.”  (AMP, emphasis added)

  • 1 Corinthians 15:33 “Do not be deceived: “Bad company corrupts good morals.” (AMP)

  • 2 Corinthians 6:14 “Do not be unequally bound together with unbelievers [do not make mismatched alliances with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership can righteousness have with lawlessness? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” (AMP)

  • 2 Corinthians 6:17 “So come out from among unbelievers and be separate,” says the Lord, “And do not touch what is unclean; And I will graciously receive you and welcome you [with favor],”  (AMP)

 

 

6 Comments

Filed under Abuse and the Healing Journey, Mental Health, Narcissism

6 responses to “Think No Contact Is Wrong? God Disagrees

  1. Abusers (and even other Christians) will often tell us how immoral and un-Christian it is to go NC with those who hurt us. But the Bible tells us that is untrue. As survivors we need always to keep these verses in mind so that we don’t fall back into allowing our abusers or their enablers to tell us how God wants us to live. I’ve been able to resist the temptation to break NC because these verses tell me that His will isn’t for me to live under bondage to a narcissist.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Yesterday, as I drove for almost an hour a half to the surgeon’s office to get the results of my biopsies, I did a lot of praying. I prayed about my health, prayed for my children, for my grandchildren, my stepchildren and step grandchildren. I prayed for my husband, my elderly aunt, my cousins, my siblings and their families. Then I prayed for my mother. As I prayed for her, I thought about our last phone conversation, when she verbally abused me so horribly. I told her that she was wrong in what she was saying. Then I said “I can’t do this anymore,” and I hung up.

    “Maybe I should send her a Christmas card,” I thought. “Just to let her know that I don’t hate her and I am praying for her.”

    I prayed, asking God what I should do. “Just leave her alone,” were the words that came to my mind.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thank you so much this enlighting post with all the bible verses. The last bible verse spoke to me thirty years ago when I finally pulled myself together to leave an abusive husband after nine years of hardships and humiliations in our marriage. something similar is found in Isa 55:12 about to be let out of exile with our Leader, The Lord himself

    Liked by 1 person

    • You’re welcome!

      I just looked up the verse…so beautiful!

      “For you will go out [from exile] with joy
      And be led forth [by the Lord Himself] with peace;
      The mountains and the hills will break forth into shouts of joy before you,
      And all the trees of the field will clap their hands.

      Liked by 2 people

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