Recently I was speaking with a fellow blogger, Linda Lee at https://ablogabouthealingfromptsd.wordpress.com (it’s a great blog! Check it out!). We were talking about how we don’t believe God created people for things like surviving abuse & losing someone we love which is what makes coping with such things so incredibly hard. During this conversation, she told me something very interesting. Some time ago, she spent time under the care of the well known Meier Clinic. In fact, she was blessed enough to be under the care of Dr. Meier directly! After a lifetime of abuse & bad mental health diagnoses, this was an incredible blessing! What he told her made so much sense in her situation, but I believe in other people’s situations as well. It sure fit mine! It probably will fit your situation too!
“You are NOT mentally ill. What you have is called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Although PTSD is classified as a mental illness for insurance purposes, the reality is that having PTSD after experiencing overwhelming trauma is perfectly normal — no less normal than it is to bleed, if somebody cuts you with a knife. You see, God did not create us for abuse. God is love, and He made us in His spiritual image, which means that we were created for kindness and love, not for abuse and hatred. God created us to love and be loved. But when we get hate instead of love, when we receive abuse instead of kindness, we are damaged by that. Being damaged by abuse does not mean that you are weak or crazy. The strongest, sanest person in the world will develop PTSD, if they go through enough trauma and abuse. Just as the strongest man in the world will bleed, if you take a knife and cut him. Human skin was not created to withstand the sharp blade of a knife. In the same way, the human soul was not created to be traumatized and abused.”
I have beat myself up a LOT since learning I have C-PTSD. I’ve told myself I’m so weak & other people had it worse & all kinds of heartless, invalidating things. It doesn’t help when other people’s words & actions re-enforce such things. I have found that sometimes those who have suffered abuse yet don’t have C-PTSD can be as judgmental as those who lack empathy for those who have been abused.
Anyway I find Dr. Meier’s words to my friend so comforting!! Having C-PTSD or PTSD is a very normal response to a very abnormal situation! These disorders aren’t a sign of weakness. They are a sign of being normal.
Also, notice that he said. “The strongest, sanest person in the world will develop PTSD, if they go through enough trauma and abuse.” That tells me that no one is immune to traumatic responses. Every single person has a breaking point, a point where enough is enough, & the trauma they experience will cause their brain to develop PTSD or C-PTSD. Everyone’s breaking point is different, so there is no point in judging others who have one of these disorders. No one is immune!
The next time you’re feeling weak or like a failure for living with PTSD or C-PTSD, I hope you’ll remember what Dr. Meier said. Print them out. Save them somewhere on your computer or phone. Share them on Facebook. Whatever you do, please remind yourself of them! I certainly plan to do so & do so often! It can get too easy to go down the rabbit hole of thinking you’re a failure for having such a problem & that isn’t right! No one is immune! They are natural reactions to highly abnormal circumstances, nothing more!
2 responses to “Very Wise Words About PTSD & C-PTSD.”
Reblogged this on A Blog About Healing From PTSD and commented:
I just had to reblog this new post by my blogger friend, Cynthia Bailey-Rug, especially since she is quoting a conversation that she and I recently had, and she included a link to my blog in her post. Although I have already included this information in a page on my blog called ***How to Heal PTSD***, I realize that not everyone reads my blog pages. Plus, Cynthia has a way of putting things into words, that definitely surpasses my writing skills. Which is why I highly recommend following her blog if you have ever experienced abuse, particularly narcissistic abuse, and especially if you have Post Traumatic Stress in any form, as a result.
Best of all, Cynthia, like me, is a woman of faith. Before I became a Christian believer seventeen years ago, I could barely function with my almost lifelong PTSD. My faith in the Lord Jesus has made ALL the difference. Especially now, during this scary, strange, turbulent time that we are living in, with this covid-19 coronavirus pandemic! My granddaughter and her husband have tested positive for covid-19, they just got the results of their test on Good Friday. Truly, if I were still an agnostic atheist, I think I would be losing my mind right now!
Thank you to everyone who has answered my request for prayers for them, by the way. Both my granddaughter and her husband are feeling better!!!!!
Okay, here is Cynthia’s post about what Paul Meier, MD, of Richardson, Texas, told me in March 2003, when he diagnosed my Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Very wise and encouraging words, indeed!I
PS: It was in Dr. Meier’s New Life Clinic that I became a Christian believer. Dr. Meier is a Christian. And he has authored or coauthored over 100 books, many of which were bestsellers. I literally owe my sanity and my life to Dr. Meier.
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What a great (and true) perspective! The last thing someone who has gone through trauma needs is the added trauma of condemnation, whether it’s from someone else or self-inflicted. I’m so glad you were able to be helped by Paul Meier. He’s awesome.
P. S. So glad your granddaughter and her husband are feeling better! – answered prayer! 🙂
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