I was thinking of something & thought I’d pass it along to those of you who read my work & follow my YouTube channel.
April 25, 2019 was the day I buried my mother. I decided not to have a funeral because those she was closest to were elderly, ill &/or lived too far away to attend her funeral. The day of her burial, I knew I didn’t have to be there, so I was unsure if I would attend or not. That is at least until that morning. The cemetery called. Apparently they made a huge blunder. My parents bought two double decker plots, one for them & another for my husband & I. When my father died, he was to be buried at double depth, then my mother on top at regular depth. The problem was the day of my mother’s burial, they learned my father was buried at normal depth! They had to exhume him, rebury him in the neighboring plot, fill in the now empty grave & then they could bury my mother. I had to rush to the cemetery to fill out paperwork giving my permission to do this. I did this & returned home, deciding to go back to the cemetery for her burial to be certain no more mistakes were made.
This was horrific to put it mildly, especially on top of losing my mother, learning I was to handle her estate matters, try to help her traumatized cat & continue to live my own life. Yet, it got worse…
At the grave side with my husband & best friend, I realized someone else showed up. The cousin who was a devoted flying monkey to my parents & the cruelest to me when my father was dying! She approached me to tell me she was just there for my mother. I told her to leave & she wasn’t welcome. She smugly refused. I called her a nasty name, which then fueled her insanity to start screaming. Thankfully her husband dragged her off as my husband told her to get lost. Her husband & the cemetery staff kept her away from me until I left, once my mother was safely buried.
The reason I’m sharing this story with you is this… never underestimate narcissists & their flying monkeys. Always expect the worst out of them. I clearly made a mistake by not expecting anyone to show up to my mother’s burial. That day I felt I was at the edge of sanity with my trashy cousin trying to push me over the edge. If I hadn’t underestimated narcissistic behavior, I could’ve been more mentally prepared to handle the situation or asked the cemetery not to tell anyone when my mother’s burial would be.
I’m not trying to make anyone feel paranoid, like you constantly have to look over your shoulder. However, when these people have been in your life in any capacity, even only briefly as a flying monkey, you need to know that they may come back at any time, in particular at your worst possible times.
Narcissists are glad to cause pain. I believe that most flying monkeys are also narcissists, which is why they see nothing wrong with encouraging people to tolerate abuse or treating people any old way they like under the guise of trying to help. If they truly think this way then there is no low too low for them. Never forget that! Protect yourself as much as humanly possible from such people. Know they are capable of anything. If at all possible, avoid them. Block any & all contact they have with you & don’t speak to them. If that is not possible, then remember to Gray Rock. Be boring. Never give into any control measures they try to use on you. Never show them any emotions you have. Never provide any personal information about yourself or your life. Remember what they find interesting about you & deny them of that. These people deserve nothing from you, so provide them with nothing & protect yourself!