Some years ago, I used to sell bath & beauty products I made from all natural ingredients. I got an email one day about my products. I was surprised that this wasn’t the usual email asking if I could make some specialty product or make a unique scent for some perfume that the buyer wanted. Instead, the person emailing asked if I practiced witchcraft. Apparently because I used natural products & openly discussed my preference for herbal remedies over man made, this person assumed I was a practicing witch, not a Christian.
Several years after that, I had met someone online. We shared a love of crocheting, so we discussed it often. One day, she shocked me by saying, “I know why you don’t have kids. It’s because of your mother! You shouldn’t let her make you feel that way!” Since we never discussed children in depth other than I had none & she had a son, her saying this was astonishing. She also didn’t know me well enough to make such a judgment, but she then scolded me for feeling the way she assumed I felt.
Not long ago, someone my husband & I have known for years thanked my husband for doing something for her, then told him to thank me for “letting” him help her out.
I’m sharing these strange little stories because I wanted to show just how utterly foolish judgmental people can be. People other than witches like natural things. Consider how many people of all religious backgrounds like a cup of chamomile tea to help them sleep. The second person assuming my mother is why I don’t have children isn’t any better. My mother had nothing to do with my feelings. And as far as me “letting” my husband do things for someone else, that is simply laughable. Having been subjected to controlling people in my life & being very aware of how awful it is, why would I do that to anyone, let alone someone I love? Yet, in spite of the ridiculousness of these assumptions, these & equally stupid ones happen to people every day, all the time.
While it can be easy to judge someone, that doesn’t make it right. The Bible tells us not to judge each other. We are only supposed to judge in a discerning way. John 7:24 in the Amplified Bible says “Do not judge by appearance [superficially and arrogantly], but judge fairly and righteously.” In other words, appearance isn’t everything! Judge by the things a person does. Their actions dictate their heart, & the heart is so much more important than appearance! Some of the kindest people you can meet are covered in tattoos & piercings while some of the cruelest people you can meet wear modest clothing, volunteer or attend church every Sunday.
You may think that you aren’t a judgmental person, & I hope you aren’t. But please look honestly at yourself. If you see a homeless man, do you deliberately avoid giving him money because you assume he will use it for drugs or alcohol? He may use money for drugs or alcohol, that is true, but he may use it to feed his dog or get a pair of shoes since his are worn through. He may be struggling with mental illness or lost his job then his home. Such things don’t make him a bad person. They make him a person with a problem. You may be his answer to prayer, but you won’t be if you judge him by his appearance. Whatever his story may be, if you don’t try to offer him at least a little help, that says more about the condition of your heart than it does about him.
I just wanted to encourage you today to take a look at your behavior, & if you recognize you can be unfairly judgmental sometimes, then please change that about yourself. Not only is being judgmental ungodly behavior, but it also steals your peace. There is no point in weighing yourself down with opinions of people & things that aren’t even any of your business in the first place. Focus on what you need to, & don’t worry about the things that aren’t your concern.