“Best friends” is a term that is used pretty freely & often without much thought. I don’t do that, however. I have a best friend that is incredibly special to me. We met just before our senior year of high school in August, 1988, & in the years since, she has taught me so much about the real meaning of best friend. I believe that others can benefit from what I have learned, so I want to share it today.
True best friends have healthy boundaries & they respect yours. They know what you are ok with & what you aren’t, & they respect such things. They don’t use you or are NOT ok with anyone else using you either. They will remind you that no one has the right to mistreat or abuse you, especially when you doubt it.
True best friends are honest. They won’t lie to you just because it’s easier for them. They will be honest & if that means it hurts your feelings a bit to get you to a better place, they will be honest. They will be as gentle as they can in their honesty so as to minimize the hurt because they love you, but they still will tell you the truth. They know honesty is best & they want what is best for you.
True best friends stand the test of time. Close friendships are somewhat like a marriage. You love & support each other. You have fun with each other & also are there during the hard times. You work through disagreements & can agree to disagree. You don’t just run at the first sign of problems. You do your best by your friend & they do their best by you. A wonderful friendship like this lasts for more than a few months. It can last a lifetime.
True best friends are there for you, period, even when it isn’t easy for them to be. I called my best friend as soon as I had a moment after receiving my mother’s death notification, & she was there for me from that moment on. She even attended the burial & was at my side even when one of my cousins raged at me during the burial. She listened when I was dealing with estate matters & overwhelmed. None of that was pleasant or easy for her, but she was there for me anyway. That is what a best friend does. They are there for you even when it’s incredibly difficult for them.
True best friendships aren’t one sided. There is a mutual give & take in the relationship. There will be trying times you are needier & your best friend is there for you, but there are also times when the reverse is true, & you are there for your needy best friend. As a whole though, your friendship is very balanced. You both love & support each other as needed rather than one person being the only one to offer love & support.
True best friends know you very well & accept you without judgment, yet still encourage your personal growth. Your best friend should accept you as you are because they understand why you are as you are, but they also encourage you to improve yourself. They share things they have learned that can help you.
True best friends are a gift straight from God, & if you have a wonderful one in your life as I do, you truly are blessed! Never forget to tell your best friend how much you appreciate them being a part of your life & that you love them. Never let them feel you take them for granted!