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One of my cats, a handsome orange tabby guy named Punkin, has feline PTSD. I didn’t know this when we adopted him, or rather when he adopted us. He seemed a bit skittish but pretty normal. Then one day with no provocation, he attacked our American Eskimo dog, Dixie. Shocked, my husband & I hollered his name. He stopped what he was doing, looked around then shook his head & ran off. I realized he looked like I felt when I’ve had a flashback. Thankfully, that attack was a one time incident, but even so, his symptoms aren’t always well managed. He tries, but like a human with PTSD, sometimes trying isn’t enough to keep symptoms at bay.
One day a few years ago, Punkin was running around playing & doing weird kitty energy jag things. Another of our cats, Grace, got in on the fun with him. They ran around & played for a few minutes as they often do. They stopped playing & a minute later, she sneaked up on him. Grace gently bumped into Punkin’s side as if to say “Boo!”. He didn’t see it coming & apparently his fight, flight, freeze or fawn instincts kicked in. Poor Punkin froze. He crouched low & his eyes got HUGE & he wouldn’t move. He was frozen in place. I honestly thought at first he might be having an aneurysm or heart attack. I quickly went to him to decide if we had to go to the emergency vet. I reassured & talked to him for a minute when he finally started to come out of it. He looked like he has when he’s come out of a flashback.
Something unusual happened at that point. He wanted me to hold him & he purred. These are two things that almost never happen with Punkin. When he wanted me to put him down a few minutes later, Grace meekly approached him. She checked on him then gave him a big head bonk. Her apology, I think, although she didn’t mean to upset him. She has been Punkin’s volunteer service cat since she was a kitten, always offering him love, help or anything she can when his PTSD flares up, so naturally she felt terrible for upsetting her buddy.
I’m sharing this because I know many of you who follow my work also love animals. And, like me, you seem to be drawn to those with some sort of special needs. In a cruel world, this means the chances of you adopting an animal with PTSD are fairly good. If this happens, please don’t give up on your skittish or even aggressive furbaby! Animals like this need someone who understands & is patient, who can help them cope with what is happening.
If you wonder if your furbaby has PTSD, there are some signs…
Nightmares are common. If your furbaby twitches dramatically in his sleep, this is often the sign of a nightmare. Gently pet him & talk to him. That can help stop it. If not, wake him up.
Being skittish or jumpy. This is the animal equivalent of hyper-vigilance. Try not to make sudden moves around your furbaby. Keep a calm, quiet environment as much as possible.
Anxiety. Some signs of anxiety are restlessness, lack of or too big of an appetite, being destructive or pottying in unacceptable places. Along with keeping a calm environment at home, try to maintain a consistent schedule. Medication may be helpful too. Talk to your veterinarian about this option if you think it may help.
Flashbacks can be hard to recognize in animals but they do have them. Punkin attacking Dixie was a pretty obvious one, but other signs of flashbacks are sudden abnormal behavior. Our late dog, Bear, also had PTSD, & I believe his former owner caused it by being abusive. The man wore heavy leather gloves for work, & whenever Bear saw me put gloves on, he would attack my hands. If your furbaby has obvious triggers like Bear did, avoid those triggers as much as possible. Also, flashbacks can take a lot out of an animal, so don’t be surprised if your little one takes a long nap after or even drags a bit for a day or two.
If you have PTSD or C-PTSD, you have an advantage for helping your furbaby. You know what helps you when symptoms get bad. Chances are, those same things will help your little one.
If you don’t know how to help, just watch your furbaby. Animals tell humans what they want & need from us. With Punkin, often he wants to be left alone when things get bad. I watch him from a distance during those times. Other times, he obviously wants snuggles, so I give him all the snuggles he wants. Follow your furbaby’s lead to help the most. PTSD in animals is sad of course, but it can be managed, just like it can with people. Love, understanding & patience will go a long way in helping your furbaby life a happy life in spite of the disorder.
This is Punkin with his buddy, Grace.
Filed under Animals
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I have debated quite a bit about sharing this post since it’s so unusual, but feel like it may be a good thing to share. I hope it encourages others who have lost their beloved pets.
Years ago, I wrote a book called, “Pawprints On Our Hearts”. I wrote it after realizing just how much my wonderful pets have taught me over the years. Losing them also has been a learning experience for me. Mostly it taught me they still love us & think of us even after passing on.
Some of you know, we lost one of our cats in the early hours on June 24. Fergus was just under 4 years old & healthy. He had spent much of his final day chasing his favorite laser pointer, in fact. His sudden & unexpected death came as a total shock to all of us.
Losing a beloved pet is always a huge struggle for me. My pets are my kids, & are more family to me than my human family. Somehow, losing Fergus was even harder than usual. So hard, I couldn’t even face his death at first because it hurt too much. For someone like me who believes in facing pain head on to deal with it, that is highly unusual & confusing. To cope, I did a lot of praying as I was able to.
Last week, I couldn’t stop crying one evening & in the midst of that, God told me some wonderful things.
Fergus always knew somehow that he wouldn’t have a long life. That is why he was so passionate & playful- he wanted to enjoy every possible moment of whatever time he had.
Also, he died of a stroke as I suspected. I was confused at first, because my late snowshoe girl, Jasmine, had her first stroke at 13 yet survived with minimal problems. God told me that Fergus’ stroke was different. He would have been paralyzed if he survived, so God felt it kinder to take him rather than let him live in a state that would’ve made Fergus miserable. I had to agree.
God also said Fergus is happy & playing lots. He also loves me, but is worried about me being so sad he’s gone. God told him this is what happens with humans when we lose someone we love. It’s normal & it will get better in time.
This was a lot to absorb, so I asked God to give me a sign if it was true. I was listening to music shuffling on my cell phone at the time. The song that came on immediately after asking for a sign was Queen’s “The Show Must Go On” & I knew in my heart, this was my sign. Fergus was very flamboyant, passionate, caring, intelligent & loving. This song is one of my favorites by Queen. It was written by the guitarist for the lead singer when he was dying. The lead singer, upon thinking about it, was quite similar to Fergus.
The reason I’m sharing this with you is because I hope to offer you comfort if you too have lost a beloved pet. Animals have souls, just like people. When they die, their souls move on just like people’s do. They also love deeply, & death doesn’t change that.
If you’re missing your beloved furbaby, then please, turn to God. He can & will be glad to give you what you need to help you cope. I have experienced that repeatedly! Fergus isn’t the first one of my cats to have a special song. Far from it! Jasmine’s is, “Angel” by Aerosmith. Georgie’s is, “Angel Eyes” by Steelheart. Vincent’s is “Someday We’ll Be Together” by the Supremes. There are others as well, but I don’t want to bore you with the long list. Anyway each time God told me that my loved ones wanted me to know about a special song, healing started. He may do the same for you or He may do something else to help you start to heal. Whatever happens, it will be what God knows will help you more than anything. It’ll bring you comfort & peace knowing that one day, you’ll see your sweet little furbaby again. In the meanwhile, God is caring for that little one.
And, just because I love showing off my furkids, here’s Fergus. Yes, that tail is orange tabby striped. No, it doesn’t look like it belongs on a white kitty. We are reasonably sure it held magical powers because everyone who saw Fergus fell in love with him.. lol
Filed under Animals, Christian Topics and Prayers
Since so many of you who follow my work are also animal lovers, I thought I would take one of my periodic rides off the topic of narcissism to talk about animals.
On this day in 2007, my first cat, Magic, died, & this post is my way to honor him. He died quietly in my arms after living with heart problems for 3 years. I wondered sometimes after he died if his death was going to kill me. He was my furry soulmate & best friend. I went through life on auto pilot for quite some time after his death. Yes, I was glad Magic was healthy again & with God, but even that didn’t console me. I wanted my special guy back & knowing that wasn’t going to happen was incredibly painful & hard to accept.
My feelings & experiences aren’t unique. Many animal lovers suffer greatly when their beloved pet dies. I have some suggestions to help you get through that awful time.
Accept that you never will “get over” losing your baby. Instead, you need to adapt to a new life without your loved one. There is no easy way to do this. Take it one step at a time.
Grief takes time, so don’t rush yourself or berate yourself for not “being over” it yet. The more you try to rush the grief process, the longer it will end up taking.
Cry. Admittedly, that sounds like common sense, but often a reminder is necessary. You just lost someone you love dearly, & need to cry. There is absolutely no shame in this!
When reminders of your lost one happen, feel your grief at that time rather than ignore it. Yes, it’s hard when it suddenly hits you that this is the usual time you gave your baby his medicine & now you don’t have to do it, but ignoring that sadness only hurts you more. Feeling the pain enables you to process it.
Be careful who you talk to about your experiences & pain. Not everyone feels the same way you do about animals. This means that whether intentional or not, some people can say insensitive & invalidating comments. They will hurt worse when you’re already hurting, so use wisdom on who you talk to.
Don’t rush out & adopt a new pet immediately. Adopting another pet may be just what you need to help you get through your grief. Or, it may be a painful reminder that your loved one is no longer with you. Some people adopt another pet who resembles the one who recently passed, unconsciously expecting the new pet to act like the old one, then are disappointed when that doesn’t happen. If you wish to honor your departed one by adopting another pet, seriously think about it first. Then only adopt another if you feel strongly in your heart it is a good move for you at the time.
If you don’t journal, now may be the perfect time to start. Write out your feelings. Write about your memories of good times shared with your pet. It will help you to write these things out.
Create some type of memorial to your pet. Make a small garden at your pet’s grave. Or, start a scrapbook of pictures of your pet, preferably including plenty of you two together. If you make jewelry, you can make an item that reminds you of your pet. You can include a picture, a tuft of fur or some of your pet’s cremated ashes in a tiny urn.
Most importantly, talk to God. I have asked Him for comfort, to help me accept my loss & even to tell my departed loved ones that I love & miss them. Not once has He said no or I shouldn’t do this, so I assume that means it’s ok. And, many times after asking that, I have had dreams about my loved ones. I don’t believe that the dead can technically enter our dreams, but I do believe that God gives us dreams about them when we need them. Maybe they ask Him to make that happen, I’m unsure, but in any case, those dreams can be very comforting & wonderful.
Although it may not seem like it right after losing your beloved pet, you will survive. In time, you will smile instead of cry once again when you think of your loved one. xoxo
Filed under Animals, Mental Health
As I’ve mentioned a few times, I have a wonderful kitty by the name of Punkin who has feline PTSD. Here is his picture.. is he not incredibly handsome!?
A few months after adopting him in 2014, one morning out of the blue, he attacked our little American Eskimo dog, Dixie. She wasn’t even looking at him when he suddenly jumped her. My husband & I both hollered Punkin’s name, which got his attention fast. He looked almost as if he woke up. He looked at us & Dixie, then ran off & hid. We checked on Dixie & thankfully she was fine, just very shaken up. While consoling her, my husband & I talked about what happened, & I told him that the way Punkin looked reminded me of how I felt after a flashback. I knew animals could be traumatized of course, but I was unsure if it could develop into PTSD. I did some research & learned it absolutely can. Since I have C-PTSD, I felt somewhat equipped to deal with the situation. It’s been quite the learning experience to say the least! But, my husband & I have learned & I wanted to share it for you other cat parents out there in case you too have a traumatized furbaby on your hands.
In all fairness, I’m not positive how the symptoms show up in other animals, but I believe they’re rather similar. Our late dog, Bear, had been abused & once in a while he acted quite a bit like Punkin does. I believe he had a milder case of PTSD than Punkin has. That leads me to believe the symptoms are probably quite similar among animals, not just among cats.
PTSD symptoms in cats are quite similar to humans. They have an extremely sensitive startle reflex, so they sometimes react inappropriately to situations. If they get scared, fight or flight instincts may take over. Punkin tends to freeze- his pupils dilate & he won’t move. They can be very anxious too, which means they may be skittish, hide or potty outside the litter box. Separation anxiety can happen too. They’re hyper vigilant, always extremely aware of their surroundings. Getting angry easily can be another symptom. as can being depressed. Signs of depression can mean losing interest in things they normally enjoy such as food, playing or snuggles, They may have nightmares, which you can see by how they sleep. Most cats twitch a bit in their sleep, but a cat with PTSD will do so more often & violently. Another big clue is they avoid things that can be similar to the traumatic event. I believe due to how Punkin attacked Dixie his trauma was related to a dog. She was the only animal or person in our home he ever attacked. And yes, they can have flashbacks. If you haven’t seen someone have a flashback or if you don’t have them, it can be hard to identify. When Punkin has had them, he doesn’t look quite like himself. His eyes get huge & you see fear written all over his face. He also acts completely out of character, like when he attacked Dixie, then suddenly stops. The first time it happened, he hid for quite a while, but after that, he returns to normal in a few hours. They also make him very tired.
There are some ways to cope with feline PTSD that I have found to be pretty successful.
I talk to Punkin. I tell him I understand what he’s going through, & it stinks. It’ll be ok, though, there is no one or nothing here that will hurt him. He’s safe & surrounded by other cats & people who adore him.
I also follow his lead. Punkin is very loving, but not particularly snuggly. Sometimes when the PTSD flares up, he wants to be left alone & other times he wants me to hold him. I do whichever he wants.
When Punkin has bad days, I do my best to remain completely calm in his presence. Cats pick up on the energy of their humans, so if I’m calm, he’ll be calmer. I don’t tell him “calm down”. Instead, my energy says everything is fine, & there is nothing to be upset about.
Catnip is a life saver! I started giving it to him to try to help his anxiety levels. It didn’t take him long to learn that it helps, so he goes to it often & voluntarily when his symptoms flare up. I got some very soft, fuzzy socks from the dollar store for this purpose. I put some catnip in a small rag, tie it up, & put it in the sock. Punkin also likes jingle bells so I have some with bells inside, some without. He picks whatever he likes as he needs his ‘nip. Since it doesn’t work for dogs, I used to give Bear valerian root pills. The smell is very strong & it tastes pretty yukky, so it wasn’t easy to get him to take it at first. It didn’t take him long to realize that it helped though, so he began going to where I stored it to let me know when he needed some valerian.
Some pet parents also get tranquilizers for their pet from the vet or use other calming aids that are readily available.
If you too have a pet with PTSD, following these steps really can help. I’m happy to say that Bear turned into a very loving, gentle dog from an aggressive one & Punkin’s symptoms are managed very well. He rarely has flashbacks anymore, & his anxiety levels are much lower in general.
Filed under Animals, Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Filed under Abuse and the Healing Journey, Mental Health, Narcissism
Most of the victims of narcissistic abuse I have spoken with are devoted animal lovers. I’m one too. My pets, past & present, mean the world to me. I also love other animals that aren’t my pets.
It won’t be a surprise if you know anything about narcissists, but they aren’t the same way. Even ones that claim to love animals really don’t love them because narcissists don’t know how to genuinely love.
Animals are nothing but potential supply to narcissists. I realized that with my parents. When they would visit my home & if any of my pets paid them attention, they were happy. If one didn’t want their attention, that one was criticized harshly. Not only when the incident happened, but after the incident indefinitely. I adopted Magic, my first cat, just before Halloween, 1990. I took him to my parents’ house shortly after to introduce them to him. My mother decided to pick Magic up, even after I said he only likes me to hold him. Magic scratched her so she would put him down, which she did quickly. Until my mother & I stopped speaking in 2016, she mentioned Magic negatively from time to time even though he died in 2007.
If you have a narcissist in your life & pets, as that pet parent, it’s your job to protect your pet from the narcissist.
If the narcissist in your life is physically abusive to you, chances are good your pet will be abused too. If you can escape, do it! If you can’t just yet, try finding a home for your pet until you can escape. If your pet has been hurt, document everything! Take pictures, have a copy of his or her veterinary record. Documentation of bad behavior is always a good thing. Even if it isn’t illegal (like if your state doesn’t have strict animal abuse laws), document anyway. If your narcissist breaks the law, it can help your case to have proof of bad behavior, even when it’s not illegal.
If the narcissist is verbally & emotionally abusive, remember- animals understand what people say. I have no doubt of this at all. I’ve seen too much evidence proving they do. When my parents would upset me, there were always at least two of my cats there to distract them. Chester & Valentine in particular are very sweet cats, but very protective of me. When my parents came to my home, they would sit by them. Each time they said something upsetting to me, the cats would scratch or bite my parents’ hands. Every. Single. Time.
Also, my parents would say cruel & hurtful things to my pets. It hurt their feelings! Poor Chester was called fat more times than I can count. He’s a muscular cat & very solid, but at first glance he does look kinda chubby. I told my parents no more nasty comments to the pets or they aren’t allowed in my home. My mother wouldn’t visit my home for I think it was almost 2 years after that.
Whatever the narcissist in your life does with your pet, protect him or her! It’s your job as the parent! Proverbs 12:10 says, ” A righteous man has kind regard for the life of his animal, But even the compassion of the wicked is cruel.” (AMP) It can be hard to stand up to a narcissist, I know, but you must protect your pet. As always, when you talk to the narcissist about it, do so calmly & in a simple, matter of fact way. Any emotions you should could be narcissistic supply & something the narcissist would use to hurt you again later. As an example, telling my parents not to insult my pets, I calmly said “I won’t tolerate anyone coming into their home & talking badly to them. If you do it again, you won’t be allowed back here.” My father never said a word back to me on the topic & didn’t insult them again. My mother defended herself vehemently, stayed away for a long time after that conversation & behaved much better when she finally did return to my home.
Filed under Animals, Mental Health, Narcissism
Job 35:11 Who teacheth us more than the beasts of the earth, and maketh us wiser than the fowls of heaven? (KJV)
One of God’s greatest blessings is animals. I’ve always loved & appreciated animals, but the older I get, the more I love & appreciate them. Animals love deeply & unconditionally, they are fun, they are very intuitive & intelligent. What’s not to love?!
In 2001, my husband & I lost Bubba, a very gentle, sweet, special orange tabby cat I’d had since he was only 4 weeks old. I was absolutely convinced losing Bubba was going to kill me, my grief was so strong. In spite of the pain though, God showed me something interesting at that time- I could communicate with animals.
The day after Bubba died, I let the cats out into the backyard for some supervised fun. I went to Bubba’s freshly dug grave for a moment of grief. I told him how much I loved him & missed him, & always would. A small voice spoke to my heart saying, “It’s OK, Mommy. I feel much better now!” (Bubba suffered with feline AIDS & emphysema for about 4 months before he died) I wasn’t sure I heard this right at all, & quickly came back to the part of the yard where the cats were. Spitfire, the queen of the castle, looked at me with great concern as I came near her & I heard, “Something is wrong with Mommy.” I told my husband what happened, & he said he could believe I could hear them. After all, I was extremely close to all of our cats.
The following day, I turned on some music while I was doing housework. When Lynyrd Skynyrd’s song, “Freebird” came on, I heard what I’d thought was Bubba’s voice again, as I heard it the previous day. “Mommy, this song fits me. Listen to the lyrics.” By this time, I doubted my sanity. Once I was done my chores, I prayed, asking God what was going on. I felt no answer coming, so I opened up my Bible. It came open to the book of Job, & my eyes fell on this Scripture: Job 12:7 But ask now the beasts, and they shall teach thee; and the fowls of the air, and they shall tell thee: (KJV) Immediately, I knew I heard Bubba & Spitfire. I wasn’t crazy!
Since that time, I’ve gotten better at communicating with animals. I don’t often hear them as clearly as I did Bubba & Spitfire, but I still communicate with them constantly. What’s so interesting is the more I wanted to communicate with them, the more they wanted to communicate with me. Our late chow chow mix, Bear, taught me that when he barked once it meant yes, twice meant no & three times meant I love you. Vincent, my granddad’s cat that we ended up adopting in 2008, told me one day his great great great great grandfather was a purebred Abyssinian cat. He was very proud of his heritage apparently. Minnie Rose, our dilute tortoise shell cat, actually tries to form words with her meows, so there is never much trouble figuring out what message she is trying to get across, especially when she says, “Yea” or, “NOOOO!!”. Punkin is our orange tabby with feline PTSD. He is very vocal & very clear at communicating whatever he wants me to know with certain facial expressions as well as meows.
I’m always impressed by how if you just pay attention to them, animals will make sure you know what they want you to know. You just need to be observant.
Also, not all animals are overly interested in communication with people, so if you try to communicate with some animals, they may have absolutely no interest, no matter how hard you try. Some seem to put up a mental wall.
Be careful reading about communicating with animals. Some who discuss animal communication claim it is some sort of psychic ability instead of a gift from God. They make it sound almost occult in nature. I have asked God to help me to communicate with animals His way, & with whatever animals He wants me to communicate with. I believe keeping God involved keeps anything bad out of what really should be God’s gift to His children.
Several years ago, I wrote my first book on the topic of animals. I even included some about things my animals & I have discussed. If you would like to check out this book, it is called, “Pawprints On Our Hearts”, & is available at this page on my website, simply scroll down : http://cynthiabaileyrug.com/Books-For-Sale.php
Filed under Animals, Christian Topics and Prayers, Mental Health
Ecclesiastes 3:19 “For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast: for all is vanity.” (KJV)
I realize many Christians will disagree with me, stating that humans are much more valuable than animals. I respectfully disagree though. God loves the animals He created. Reread the Scripture I opened this post with: Ecclesiastes 3:19 “For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast: for all is vanity.” (KJV) The Scripture states. “that a man hath no preeminence above a beast,” so obviously God believes humans & animals to be equal.
Other Scriptures speak of the value of animals:
Animals are a wonderful blessing to people! They offer us companionship, unconditional love, help us with chores (such as on a farm), & if we pay attention, teach us a great deal. I’ve had pets since shortly after moving out of my parents’ home at age 19, & pray there never will come a time I don’t have any! Mine have blessed me in more ways than I can count! They have made me laugh or comforted me when I was upset, defended me to people who were nasty to me, & taught me many things, including how to be a good mom.
I hope you, Dear Reader, aren’t one who thinks animals are “just dumb animals” like many people do. If so, though, I pray you’ll consider what I’ve written, & reconsider your position!
And, if you’re an animal lover like me, but never thought about such Scriptures, then please, also consider this post. Maybe pay a bit more attention to your furkids- they are wonderful teachers, & you can learn so much from them. Don’t forget to let them know how much you love & appreciate them, too! They appreciate hearing such things just as much as you do! 🙂
Filed under Animals, Christian Topics and Prayers
At the time of me writing this post, it’s just over a month since my sweet tabby cat, Weeble passed away suddenly at 16. She was the oldest member of our family, & deeply loved & respected by the other furkids.
Since her passing, I haven’t been able to wash the linens on the guest bed where she & I spent her last 30 hours as she fought so hard for her life. Aside from the obvious fact that grief takes a lot out of you & I haven’t had much energy, the other cats have spent time on that bed quite a bit since her passing. Chester in particular naps often in the very spot where she passed away.
I think it was 2 days after her death that I found him here, & asked him “Are you missing Weeble?” He meowed a soft, mournful meow, & pulled the covers close to him. It broke my heart. Grieving is hard enough but the hardest part is watching the furbabies hurting too & not being able to do anything to help them feel better.
Animals feel deeply. Moreso than many humans I’ve known. Please remember that about your pets. They hurt when another animal in your home dies too, so don’t forget to give them extra love & comfort during this trying time. It will help both of you to feel better.
And, keep their feelings in mind at other times too! They can be hurt just as easily as a human can if someone snaps at them after a bad day or ignores them for the TV. Criticisms hurt them too. Don’t forget, animals understand the words you say, not just the tone of your voice. If you call your dog fat or your cat lazy, they know exactly what you mean, & it makes them feel as badly as it would you if someone called you fat or lazy. (This topic has been the cause of many arguments with my narcissistic mother, as she thinks it’s acceptable to come into my home & tell my pets who is too fat, too skinny, too whatever. It took over 20 years to get her to stop that awful behavior.) Calling your pet beautiful, smart, etc. will have a very positive effect too, just as it would if someone complemented you. I also tell my furkids how proud I am of them, how smart & caring they are. I praise them frequently & they respond to it well. Do the same with your pets, & see if they don’t love the praise!
One interesting thing I’ve noticed is that my furkids love to be prayed for. Pretty Boy was diagnosed with liver carcinoma at the end of 2013. The vet said he only had a short time left. I knew the vet was right- not only was she a very good, but she showed me the bloodwork results. He also had lost 2 pounds- a fair amount of weight for a cat. His side where his liver is also felt somewhat enlarged, which the vet said was his liver. She saw it on an ultrasound. I prayed for him constantly, & every time I did, Pretty Boy would purr the entire time. I even asked him before I prayed if he wanted me to pray for him, & many times, he would rub on me or headbonk me. The best part of this is when he went back to the vet the following year, there was no sign of the liver carcinoma! No swelling, he had gained back the 2 pounds he lost, & his bloodwork was fine. In fact, the vet said “it was perfect.”
Just please remember, your furkids are people too! Treat them with the love & respect they deserve, & talk to them with love. When you must correct them, do so gently & with respect. They will respond very well when you do this!
Filed under Animals, Christian Topics and Prayers
On this day in 2014, my husband & I lost one of our special cats, Georgie. We adopted him & his brother, Pretty Boy, when they were only about 4 weeks old. They were adorable tiny, fluffy black powder puffs, born to a stray living in a local lady’s yard. She said she was going to have animal control take all of the cats later in the week. Rather than let them take their chances at the shelter, we decided to adopt the brothers. After all, we had lost 2 cats in a short time prior, & another one was dying from cancer- we knew she had very little time left. Kittens always help to cheer us up (they’re so fun & silly!), these two were in need, black cats are the least likely to be adopted & also my personal favorites. It seemed like everything was saying we needed to adopt these two precious little boys.
That was in 2002, & in the 12 years we had both boys, we had a lot of laughs, mostly because of Georgie. He was mischievous & ornery, where his brother is much more serious. In spite of their very different personalities, they were inseparable. Georgie was always Pretty Boy’s protector- if another cat went to mess with Pretty Boy, Georgie intervened, even if the other cat only wanted to play. When Pretty Boy was diagnosed with diabetes in 2011, Georgie was always there to comfort his brother, especially when he came home smelling like the world’s most horrible place, the vet’s office.
Then on April 16, 2014, I realized around 10:00 that I hadn’t seen Georgie since the previous night. I texted my husband who said he hadn’t either. I thought maybe Georgie sneaked outside (as he had a couple of times before), or was hiding somewhere napping. I searched the house & couldn’t find him. He didn’t come when I called, which was very unusual. In a panic, I asked my husband to come home & help me find him. He found Georgie in our bedroom closet. Apparently he passed away in his sleep, why we don’t know.
Pretty Boy was devastated, & as you may know, stress & emotions can play havoc with one’s blood glucose levels. For a month, Pretty Boy’s already sensitive levels could jump 600 points or sink 600 points in a 12 hour period. Thankfully, his glucose levels started to level out after about a month. Pretty Boy has not been the same since losing his brother. He became even more serious, but at least he has developed closer friendships with the other cats.
Losing a furbaby is excruciating for people, but we aren’t the only ones who suffer. Their furry family suffers too. Blood related or not, if you have more than one pet, chances are good that they are bonded to some degree. Maybe they don’t show their love as openly as Georgie & Pretty Boy, but there is a bond there. I have had 27 cats in my adult life, & have lost 17 to date, plus had 3 dogs & lost 2 of them. I can tell you that the survivors always grieve. Not all grieve as hard as my Pretty Boy did for his brother, but there was still a great deal of pain when others passed on. I have seen it over & over
If you have lost a furbaby, please remember this! I know you are suffering, but so are your surviving furbabies. You need to help each other through the grief process. It will help you both to get through & bond you even closer.
How do you help when you feel like you’re falling apart? First, pray. Ask God to help you to help your furbaby. Pray for your furbaby- lay your hands on him or her & pray out loud. I have yet to have one pet not like this. They understand what you are doing, & they do appreciate it! Mine certainly have.
Offer your surviving furbaby extra love. Lots of snuggles & saying “I love you” truly help you both a great deal. Don’t think animals don’t know what you’re saying, only the tone of voice- they understand exactly what you’re saying! And, like humans, hearing a heart felt “I love you” is always welcomed, but especially when they are hurting. This helps you too- when you receive snuggles in return, it helps to lift your spirits.
You can take your baby for a walk- not only dogs enjoy walks, but some cats do as well. In fact, some cats enjoy walking with a harness & leash, believe it or not. If your kitty isn’t a fan, they make pet strollers that safely protect your cat in a netted cage of sorts, allowing her to enjoy the fresh air & remain protected at the same time.
Playing is always a good bonding experience with your pet, & it helps to elevate both your moods. I have yet to meet a dog who didn’t love a good game of fetch or tug of war. Most cats enjoy cat nip, chasing a piece of string or rope & some even enjoy jingle bells or small crinkle balls. The experience also helps to cheer you up because it’s such fun watching your furbaby have fun.
Losing a pet is a painful, horrible experience, but never forget, it also hurts your other pets. They need you now more than ever, & you need them.
Filed under Animals, Christian Topics and Prayers
Tomorrow is a day I can’t forget. On January 21, 2007, I lost my sweet cat, Magic. He died quietly in my arms after over three years of dealing with heart problems, which was twice as long as vets expected him to live.
Magic was very special. Not only was he my first cat, but he was also my soul mate. He was extremely in tune with me. He defended me when people were cruel to me. He comforted me when I was sad & snuggled me when I was happy. He was extremely intuitive, intelligent, fun, caring & a wonderful surrogate daddy to the other cats & dogs. It’s hardly a surprise that after his death, he was still special..
One day not long after losing Magic, I was listening to the soundtrack from the TV show, “Touched By An Angel.” Wynonna’s song “You Were Loved” came on. God spoke to my heart & said, “This is your & Magic’s song. He wanted you to know that.” Even now, I cry when I hear the song, remembering that precious moment.
That wasn’t even the first time something like this happened. In December 2001, I experienced my first kitty death. My sweet boy, Bubba died from FIV & emphysema at only age 9. God gave me Lynyrd Skynyrd’s “Freebird” two days later. In 2002 after Sugar died suddenly & completely unexpectedly, God told me the same thing about Lonestar’s “Not A Day Goes By” There have been other songs too. In December 2010 when Vincent died, on my way back from burying him, the song “Someday We’ll Be Together” started going through my mind. God told me that was Vincent’s & my song. A similar thing happened the following year when Jasmine passed, except the song was Aerosmith’s “Angel” & in 2014 when Georgie passed with Steelheart’s “I’ll Never Let You Go.”
My point in sharing all of this with you, Dear Reader, is to reassure you. Not only people go to Heaven or Hell. Animals do as well! Mark 16:15 says to preach the Gospel to all creation or to every creature in every single translation I’ve seen. This tells me that animals also can accept Jesus as their savior. This means they can go to Heaven & we will see them again one day!
I also firmly believe that death doesn’t mean that they no longer think of their humans once they are gone. I have no doubt they think of us & miss us as we think of & miss them. Otherwise, why would God have told me they wanted me to know that these songs are ours?
If you have lost lost a precious pet, please be reassured that your baby still loves you & thinks fondly of you. And best of all, you’ll see him or her again one day. I know it hurts more than you can describe when you lose a furbaby, but knowing you’ll see them again one day is very comforting.
The songs I’ve gotten are also quite comforting. Granted, not every single furbaby & I have a song, & I don’t know why that is, but the ones I do share a song with? That song comforts me & helped me to get through the initial, devastating pain of losing them. If you haven’t experienced this, it may be a good idea to ask God about it. He certainly won’t object to it! And, who knows? Maybe you were too caught up in your grief to notice God gently trying to tell you about a song. It’s certainly possible to be grieving so hard, you don’t listen to God. I’ve done that myself.
If you have experienced the pain of losing a furbaby, please know I understand. It’s devastating!
Filed under Animals, Christian Topics and Prayers
I’ve always been an avid animal lover, especially cats. In 2009 after losing my 18 year old tabby cat Sneezer, I thought I’d study what the Bible has to say about animals. It was very eye opening! I learned enough to write a full book on the topic, “Pawprints On Our Hearts”
The Bible has so much to say about God’s love for the wonderful animals that He created. Two verses though really spoke to my heart about how valuable animals are:
Job 12:7-10 “But ask the beasts, and they will teach you; the birds of the heavens, and they will tell you; or the bushes of the earth, and they will teach you; and the fish of the sea will declare to you. Who among all these does not know that the hand of the Lord has done this? In his hand is the life of every living thing and the breath of all mankind.” (ESV)
Job 35:11 “Who teaches us more than the beasts of the earth and makes us wiser than the birds of the heavens?’” (ESV)
I’ve always known that animals can make wonderful companions, but they also are wonderful teachers. After reading those verses, it began to click in my mind just how good they are at teaching.
My first cat, Magic, taught me how to be a good mom to my cats. He was always loving & patient with them, even the neediest young kittens. He knew exactly what they needed & how to meet those needs.
Vincent taught me to appreciate the little things & people. One day I was walking him outside & he stopped to let the cool fall breeze flow through his fur. The look on his face was sheer bliss. When it stopped, he looked at me, then grabbed my hand & kissed it, I believe to thank me for allowing him to enjoy the experience of being outside.
Jasmine inspired me to never give up. She had 4 strokes in just under 2 years, & fought incredibly hard to recover from them, even when a vet told me I should put her down.
If you just pay attention to the animals in your life, you can learn some really amazing things. I have asked God to help me to learn from my furbabies. They are also some amazing teachers, always willing to teach you.
I also talk to them just as I talk to people. Animals are very intelligent, & they truly understand what we say to them, not only the tone of our voices as some wrongly believe. They also find ways to convey their messages to you. I remember one time before my dog, Bear, passed.. he had arthritis really badly, & one day he needed a pain pill. He came into the kitchen as I was washing dishes & looked at me. I could tell he was hurting by how he walked, & asked if he was ok. He looked at the fridge, then me. I asked if he needed a pill & he barked once as if to say “yes!” I gave him his pill, & he gave me a kiss in return.
Animals are truly a blessing & a gift straight from God. If you aren’t enjoying them or enjoying them as much as you could, I urge you to give them a try. Get to know them. Ask them questions. They’ll find a way to answer. Most of all, love them & enjoy their friendship. It will bring you great joy!
Filed under Animals
Good afternoon, Dear Readers!
I know my blog topics jump around from subject to subject sometimes, & I am sorry for that. I just write things as I feel God places something on my heart. For a while, I’ve been writing mostly about abuse, but today I want to discuss animals.
Lately I have been reading some very disturbing things regarding our animal companions. So many people are getting rid of their pets for stupid reasons. One story I read was of a 22 year old cat, whose owner had her for her entire life, & surrendered her to a shelter because she said she was having “personal problems.” It breaks my heart so many people act like animals are disposable. You can’t get rid of a child because of “personal problems”- why is it acceptable to do this with a cat or dog? I have cared for my pets during terrible times in my life- through sickness, nervous breakdowns, divorce, losing loved ones & more. Now that I have Complex PTSD, I still take care of them, including my cat with diabetes who requires constant testing, monitoring & insulin shots. I’m not saying this to brag- only saying it because as a pet parent, we have to take proper care of our furbabies, no matter what! If for some reason we are unable, then we need to find someone who can help us until we can resume our duties once more.
I also don’t understand why it’s acceptable to put an animal down when they are an inconvenience or sickly. I never have. The Bible says “Thou shalt not kill.” (Exodus 20:13) It doesn’t say it is acceptable if an animal is sickly or an inconvenience to his owners. I know people argue for euthanasia & some have even called me inhumane because I am not for it. However, since an animal cannot verbalize if they wish to die for whatever reason, I don’t think it is right for a human to play God, & decide when & how the animal should die. I have not once put down any of my pets when they became sick. Instead, I ask God to take them before they suffer much. It has worked out well. Not one of mine has suffered for long after they became sick.
I read something especially disturbing the other day.. Bestiality is on the rise, & becoming more socially acceptable. There are even animal brothels in some countries! Animals are being tortured to death for the sexual gratification of some perverse, sick individuals. Exodus 22:19 clearly states, “Whosoever lieth with a beast shall surely be put to death.” This tells me that God has some very serious, definite opinions on such a thing.
Sadly, I have learned recently too that there are many Christians who believe animals are unworthy of care & love from people. They believe people are so much better than animals. Many are also avid hunters. While I realize the Bible says there is nothing wrong with eating meat (after the great flood- before, people were vegetarians), I don’t understand why so many people don’t care they are taking an animal’s life! There is so little or even no respect or compassion for the animal who is dying to provide them with food! I wonder if these people are reading the same Bible I have read..
God loves animals so much! These things should not be! Proverbs 12:10 says, “A righteous man hath regard for the life of his beast, but the tender mercies of the wicked are cruel.” And, Ecclesiastes 3:19 says, “For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast: for all is vanity.” (emphasis added).
I would like to encourage you today to remember these Scriptures well & to tell others about them. Please help others to understand how wonderful our animal companions are! It is our duty as humans.
Filed under Animals, Christian Topics and Prayers
Good morning, Dear Readers!
This won’t be a long post today- I am still not feeling so well after losing my sweet Bear the other day. Thank you to everyone who has offered condolences & prayers. They are so appreciated! Everyone is deeply sad & missing our special Chow Chow. I’ve also heard a few things I wish I hadn’t since we lost Bear. I wanted to share so in case anyone who is reading this knows someone who has lost a pet, please do NOT say the following…
Please remember- when someone loses a pet, it is very much like losing a child. This person has lost someone they love, nurture, care for, medicate, feed, nurse when sick, & everything else a parent does for a child. This person didn’t lose “just an animal.” This person lost someone they loved deeply, & it is going to take time to learn to live without him/her. I can’t say pet parents ever “get over” losing their beloved pet- we simply learn to adapt the best we can without that special furkid.
This is my Bear with Bo as a kitten…he LOVED being the proud parent. When my husband & I adopted Bo & Luke in 2010, Bear was thrilled. He loved cats, but seemed to have an especially soft spot for kittens. Notice the “proud mama” smile.. 🙂
I wanted to pop in to say thank you, as well as to post a very interesting link I read this morning. It’s about discovering your “apology language.” Remember Gary Chapman’s book “The Five Love Languages” that was popular probably 15 years ago or so?? It was a really good book! Well, he’s created this quiz to help you determine your apology language, too, in other words, the type of apology that you need.
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/apology/
It’s very interesting- take a few minutes to check it out!
Wishing everyone a very good Saturday!
Filed under Animals, Mental Health
Happy Sunday, Dear Readers!
Last night was a tough one. Our 4 month old kitten, Sabrina, was sick, & we had to run her to the emergency vet. Thankfully, it turned out not to be anything terribly serious- she has a very nasty ear infection, & may be deaf in her right ear from it. It’s also given her a nasty case of vertigo. Since she’s so young, if that happens, she’ll adapt- cats are so flexible! Also thankfully, today she is doing better already. Still not up to par, of course, but improving fast. I am so grateful to God for taking care of my baby girl!!
While we were at the vet last night, a lady brought in her small dog who had been attacked. The dog died almost immediately. This poor lady wandered the hospital, holding her dead dog, wailing in her grief. My heart just broke for her. I’m telling you this for a couple of reasons..
First, please pray for this lady. Her heart was obviously broken. She needs comfort & to know God’s comfort & love. Thank you!
Secondly, if you don’t have pets, then please remember- the connection between a human & their pets can be as strong as a parent/child bond. If someone you know loses their pet, please be gentle & sensitive with them. I have been on the receiving end of insensitivity when I’ve lost one of my furkids, & it really hurts! Already being in pain from my loss seemed to magnify the hurt from the insensitivity.
Take care, Dear Readers, & have a blessed Sunday!
Hello, Dear Readers!
Today my post is to ask a favor… please pray for my wonderful Chow Chow mix, Bear. He’s spent plenty of time with the vet the last few days. I am worrying about my poor guy- he obviously isn’t feeling well, which is so unusual for him. He’s been healthy & strong for his entire 11 years, until the last week or so. Naturally this has me very concerned for him. Any & all prayers are greatly appreciated!! Thank you!
This is a pic of my handsome boy with his equally handsome little buddy, Chester… 🙂
buddies lounging on the sofa together..
Filed under Miscellaneous
Cynthia Bailey-Rug, Christian Author 
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