Tag Archives: lazy

There Is Nothing Wrong With Resting & Self-Care!

I noticed something interest in the last few hours, & I thought I’d share it with you today, Dear Readers.

As many of you know, in 2015, I nearly died from Carbon Monoxide Poisoning.  In spite of all the time that’s passed, like many others who have survived it, I still live with many symptoms.  They get better or worse, but they’re still there.  All the time.  If this post sounds “off”, I apologize- thinking clearly isn’t my strong point at the moment because that’s part of it when symptoms flare up.  I just wanted to write this out before I forgot everything I wanted to say.

So,  bringing us to what I noticed…

I noticed when I’m way too stressed or going through an exceptionally hard time, something happens to make the symptoms get to the point of me needing to rest, to take time off, because I can’t do anything else.

Lately, I’ve been having a rough time with repressed memories & flashbacks as I mentioned previously.  As if that wasn’t tough enough, at the time of me writing this, it was 1 year ago today that I lost one of my kitties & that anniversary is making me sad.  I have a knack for remembering dates & dates like this always are very hard for me, even days before.

Yesterday evening, my husband was working on my car.  I took a shower while he was doing this.  While in there, I began to feel weird (headache, dizzy, couldn’t think clearly, body aches, shaking, etc.), but thought nothing of it.  When I got out, I came into the living room & heard my car running.  I suddenly knew why I felt so yukky & didn’t think anything of it- carbon monoxide removes my ability to realize if I feel bad, something is wrong.  I quickly found my husband & ask him to move my car away from the house while she’s running because the exhaust was sickening me.  He did, but the damage was already done.  Last night & today, I’ve felt horrible.  Today, I’m resting because there’s nothing else I can do.  Physically & mentally, I’m a whipped pup.

Since I’m finally thinking a little clearer today, I realized this sort of thing happens during especially difficult times.

My point of all this?  I realized that although God didn’t give me my health problems, He has been using them to help me.

My mother has called me lazy ever since I can remember.  As a result, I’ve always worked hard.  Too hard- I rarely took time to relax.  Self-care has been a huge struggle for me, as I feel on some dysfunctional level that it’s selfish & wrong to take care of myself.  Since I’ve even ignored God’s promptings that I need to take care of myself & relax sometimes, I firmly believe God allowed getting sick to happen because now, there are times when I have no choice but to relax & rest.

Please, Dear Reader, learn from my mistakes!!  I know so many adult children of narcissistic parents who ignore their mental & physical health because they don’t want to feel selfish or lazy by taking care of themselves as I have.  This is so wrong!!  Even God rests!

Genesis 2:2  “By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work.”  (NIV)

There is absolutely nothing wrong with resting!  Self-care is vital to being healthy, physically & mentally, & frequent rest is a part of that.  I know shutting off the internal, critical voice calling you lazy or selfish is hard, but please try to do it for your own sake before you end up sick like I have.  I should’ve listened to God’s promptings years ago, but I kept ignoring them.  As a result, I believe God had no other choice but to allow this to happen to force me to rest before I killed myself by neglecting my needs.  I wouldn’t wish this on you, so please, make appropriate changes in your life.  You have every right to take care of yourself.

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Filed under Abuse and the Healing Journey, Caregiving, Christian Topics and Prayers, Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Mental Health, Narcissism

Just Relax..

Growing up, my mother told me I was lazy more times than I can count.  I never questioned this until I was almost forty years old- I simply believed I was lazy & pretty useless.  If I wasn’t being productive, I felt guilty.  Even if I was sick or injured, that was no excuse for not doing something useful.  Society gives that same message, which helped cement that belief in me.
 
I still battle this dysfunctional mindset, but I’m getting better. I’m learning from my cats- cats make no apologies for relaxing or enjoying a sun puddle.  They take care of themselves, & don’t feel a hint of guilt for it.  Neither do wolves- my other favorite animal.  When people think of wolves, they think of fierce hunters, however wolves also know how to have fun.  They are wildly playful animals.  They relax & have fun with each other & their cubs.  Why doesn’t anyone insult wolves & cats for being lazy, I wonder, yet say it about people who aren’t busy 24/7?

I think people need to get a better understanding of what it truly means to be lazy.  Goofing off when you have things to do, taking days off work for no good reason constantly or living in filth instead of cleaning your home are all examples of laziness.  However, relaxing after a hard day at work isn’t lazy.  Neither is spending the day in bed when you have the flu.  And, if you have mental health problems like me, sometimes you need to take a day to do nothing to keep yourself from getting depressed or anxious.  Sometimes you need them even if you don’t have mental health problems, actually.  Those days are vital, & there is nothing wrong with them. 

I believe it’s important to take time to relax, with no computer or cell phone, & accept it as a good thing, like our animal friends do.  Look how happy cats & wolves are.  They take time to enjoy their lives, without guilt or shame.  We could do well to follow their example!

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Filed under Abuse and the Healing Journey, Animals, Christian Topics and Prayers, Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Mental Health