So many people tell victims of abuse that they should forgive & forget, never mentioning the abuse again, in particular when the abusers in question were the victim’s parents. They love to quote Matthew 5:38-39 to prove their point. Those verses say, “Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth: 39 But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.” (KJV)
The problem is though that when you pull out a random Scripture from the Bible, you can prove almost any point. Other Scriptures on the topic need to be considered as well.
Psalm 82:4 “Rescue the weak and needy;
Rescue them from the hand of the wicked.” (AMP)
John 18: 22-23 “But when He said this, one of the officers who was standing nearby [a]struck Jesus [in the face], saying, “Is that how You answer the high priest?” 23 Jesus replied, “If I have said anything wrong, make a formal statement about the wrong; but if [I spoke] properly, why did you strike Me?” (AMP)
Acts 16:36-37 “36 And the jailer repeated the words to Paul, saying, “The chief magistrates have sent word to release you; so come out now and go in peace.” 37 But Paul said to them, “They have beaten us in public without a trial, men who are Romans, and have thrown us into prison; and now they are sending us out secretly? No! Let them come here themselves and bring us out!” (AMP)
These verses clearly show that there is nothing wrong with speaking out about abusive behavior! People need to learn & grow. They can’t do that if the never are told their actions are wrong & people hide abusive behaviors.
Granted narcissists are not exactly the easiest people in the world to confront or even simply talk about. They violently rage, create vicious smear campaigns to stop people from doing such things, & almost never learn when dealt consequences for their actions. However, even so, it’s still your job to give them consequences & to be open about their abusive ways. You give them chances to make healthy changes by doing such things, & that is the best thing you can do for them. What they do with those things from there is on them, but you can rest easy knowing you have done the right thing.
You also need to be open about what they have done to you, because you may be helping someone in a similar situation. Your story may open their eyes to just how bad narcissistic abuse is or inspire them to walk away.
Being open about the abuse inflicted on you also may cause some people to leave your life, but you know something? It will show you exactly who truly loves you. They will be the ones standing by your side & supporting you through your healing. Realizing how special these people are makes losing the others hurt a whole lot less 🙂