Lately I’ve seen memes & statuses on facebook stating basically the same thing- that no matter what horrible thing you have experienced, you should be grateful for it because it made you who you are today. Frankly, it’s getting on my final nerve…lol
How can anyone be grateful for being a victim of narcissistic abuse, beaten daily by a spouse, being in a car wreck, losing their home to a fire or even a nasty mother in-law?! I can’t fathom that.
I’ve been a victim of narcissistic abuse & other types of abuse by several people. I’ve been physically abused. I’ve been in a car & a motorcycle accident. I even have a nasty mother in-law who has hated me from the day we met, before I was even dating her son. I’m not even close to grateful for going through any of those situations. Not that I’m still angry or bitter about them, but honestly, I’m not grateful for what happened to me.
Instead, I am grateful to God. Grateful He brought me through such awful situations & even made sure good came from them. I’m grateful He put it in my heart to learn about Narcissistic Personality Disorder so now I can spot narcissists easily & know how to handle them when I have to deal with them. I’m also grateful God showed me I deserve better than to be treated so badly by people, as I once thought I deserved all of their abuse.
If someone tells you that you should be grateful that you were abused or suffered in some way, ignore them. Even if their hearts are in the right place, those words can be so hurtful & shame inducing. Don’t let that into your heart! You are allowed not to feel glad that you have suffered through some rough situations! You don’t have to try to change how you feel! Instead, just remember what you are grateful for- the strength God gave you to survive, the love He showed you as he helped you to heal, the things you learned from the situation, maybe new friends you met at a support group or the love of those close to you who supported you through your painful time.